labels

I'm really so tired of lables lately. Labels like white, black, poor, wealthy, middle class, southern, northern, foreign, elitist, democrat, republican, independent, and on and on. Really, these are way for us to categorize what we know in order for us to make sense of the world. In basic psychology we learned that when we see someone we begin to categorize them. First we define their gender, then their race, then who knows what. But those two are so important to identify when we meet someone that if they aren't clear, we are really thrown off.

I understand that this is just the way the mind works, but we want so badly to put people in categories beyond their gender and racial identity and sometimes it makes us blind to who someone really is. When we meet someone at a party, we ask questions about their socio-economic status, thier political views, where they are from, their profession, etc. So by applying those labels, we can fill in the blanks with all of our facts and judgements that we have filed away somewhere. What right do we have to jump to such conclusions about someone who may be so different from us? Shouldn't we give them the chance to show us who they really?

The Beauty of War

I sorted through the newspapers at work today and was startled to find photographs of the attacks between Israel and Lebanon that seemed so unusually beautiful. It's bothersome to me that I found these photographs to be aesthetically pleasing because they really should have "shaken me out of my boots." I think that the beauty I found in these photos diminished the intensity of emotion and feelings of sadness; I lost touch with the reality they were documentation of such suffering and turmoil. Shouldn't the media's job be to communicate the absolutely horrifying images of the war that may make us exude emotion and concern instead of passively flipping through the pages of world events? Check out these photos to see what I mean. What do you think?

blaze started by an explosion

Lebanese civil defense workers

a fuel tank at Beirut international airport

Cool websites

Evidently I look 57% like Helen Hunt

If you like music, you'll find this site interesting. And you who doesn't like music?

hellohowareyou?

I've gotta rant for a moment. It's gotten to be so annoying to me lately how people say "Hi, how are you?" without it really meaning anything. It's just a generic greeting without people really caring. Some don't even wait for a response to their question. It's like a "Hihowareyou?Fine.Houwareyou?Fine" and that's the "conversation." Do people really care how anyone is anymore? How do you know if you answer anything other than "Fine" that it's socially acceptable?

Say for instance I'm asked by a co-worker, "How are you?" and I respond with, "oh, well things are actually not going too well. I've got this awful stomach thing and I've had to really watch what I eat" What if they give me a look and politely say, "Oh, I'm sorry" but really think, "Whoa! Waaaay too much information! I didn't really want to know how she was. I was just being polite."

I guess it's their problem since they asked. But often I don't want to tell people how I really am. I feel like it's too much information sometimes. So why do we even ask if none of us care?

My friend Carrie once told me that she really did care how I was doing so I tried to break myself of the habit of the automatic response. Sometimes it takes someone to say they really care just to make it okay to say how you really are.

Change is Good

I never expected to feel this energized after making this decision about my job, but I'm excited about what's to come. I find myself looking forward to putting a lot of what I've studied and theorized about education into action. It's so nice to feel excited about something professionally after a long time feeling so flat and hopeless. I'm excited to put my creativity to use. I'm bursting with ideas!

I told my Dad about my career decision last night and he's so funny and predictable. After telling him I'm leaving my large university job for one teaching little kiddies, he was worried about my financial security. What about my retirement plan? What about my health insurance? Blah, Blah, Blah. Then his next question was about my car and where I would park it while I was working next door (the child care program is next door at my friend Joan's house who is the Executive Director of the program and now my future boss....and community member, current co-worker at my desk job and mentor). So in the end, I told my Pops that this job is a great move professionally and there's more to my happiness than getting paid with great benefits (although I do get paid fine in my new job). He said, "as long as you're happy, I'm happy for you."

And I'm so happy too, to be in my current living situation. Last night we had a house meeting, just the three of us at 49 and it was nice to just settle in. Our settling in process is slow. We still have things here and there in the house and we don't have systems in place--we are still defining who our community is. Maybe that doesn't happen with our things in the right place; it will most likely happen slowly, over time, organically. It was so nice though, to sit down for a meeting and know that a hair in the bathtub or ill communication will not stand in the way of a healthy community (like my previous living situation with Bernie).

Changes

So this is my first post. I feel like there are so many things happening in my life--so many decisions to be made, experiences to be had, disappointments to muddle through--that my life is changing right before my eyes.

My everydays are good overall.

I recently moved into a community house, where some great folks live intentionally to create a community where we support one another. It all happened so fast, this move from a really unhealthy living situation to a really healthy one. I had complete faith that this was a good move for me. Isn't that amazing when that happens, those acts of faith, where there's a calm around the decision and everything just falls into place like it's meant to be. There's no weighing the pros and cons or thinking logically. There's almost a physiological element to faith where my stomach feels good and there's a slight adrenaline rush through my body and my blood feels like it's flwoing smoothly through my veins. I don't know if scientists have ever studied this emperically but there's my qualitative data on the subject of physiological faith.

And as I sit here at my desk job (spending time blogging, I might point out as an aside), I think that I have just six weeks until I embark on another change in my life. This one did not feel quite as grounded in faith, but really faith is playing a part in what is to come. I really thought logically about this one and weighed the pros and cons. I'm getting out of the desk job and into teaching in an early childcare program. I thought about giving up the long-term financial security by working at a large, prestigious university that provides financial planning and great benefits, but I didn't want that to trump all of the items on my "pro" list for the child care program. What about opportunities to be creative, to create arts curricula, to form relationships with teachers and children, to move in a more positive direction as I forge a career in education? The decision was clear that in order to take a step in building for the future where my mind is concerned, I needed to give up a little matter (AKA money). My faith is in what lies ahead...that working in a child care program will bring me one step closer, if not more, to my goal of shaping young minds.